Just Breathe

Last night I dreamed I was drowning in a pool. I was deep in the water. I couldn't tell which way was up. I also felt paralyzed. I couldn't move. I breathed in as I was thinking I can't breathe in the water, I'll drown. I got myself moving a little bit, then looked to see if I could tell which way was up & I took another breath. Don't do that you will die, I reminded myself. I told myself to kick my legs, that will move you toward the surface. I breathe again, but I am beginning to move. One more breath & I reach the surface & the edge of the pool. I am assisted out of the water.

In writing about this dream I do not convey the fear I felt as I thought through this dream while pushing myself upward to save myself. After I woke up I could remember the fear, it felt like a real experience. I also felt relief at not drowning & began to wonder if there is any parrallel between my life & this dream. I personally believe I dream about what I am worried about, then twist it! So I decided this dream is synonimous with the 4 weeks I have left in school this semester. I struggled in my dream to breathe 4 times. The water & drowning represent the pressure I put on myself & the feeling I have of being overwhelmed, questioning myself & my ability to finish another semester with good grades. The best part of this analogy is I don't drown! I get through it. I take one step at a time & make it.

As you all know I push everything aside during school. The house goes to pot, I don't cook, I spend a lot of time reading text books. The good news is I am at the end of another semester. Only 3 weeks of class & finals. So, this dream was a good reminder to tell myself to relax & just breathe!

Thank You

Thanks Rob & Joshua. You both get a gold star! Thanks Eric & Jared. We couldn't have done it without you.

Attention Inventors Everywhere

I wish I was more dedicated to write on this blog. I love to read blogs & I love the value of recording events from a historical standpoint. So this is my request, would someone please invent a device where I could think my blog article & it would then appear on my blog? I think about blogging, actually write the article in my head, then work on homework, or housework, or whatever else takes up my day. For instance today is my 1st day of Fall Break. I get 2 days off from school. I worked the 1st half of the day, came home & typed history notes between naps. I am under the weather with a cold coming on. I went to get my blood tested, as I do every 4 weeks. I unloaded, then loaded the dishwasher. I still about 3 more class sessions worth of notes to type, I was way behind. Do you see why I need a mind to blog device? Any takers?

Newsletter Aritcle

One of my responsibilities as a counselor in the RS is writing an article in our ward newsletter. In keeping with my blog is my journal here is my article, which reflect my thoughts at this time. Last Spring I was sitting in a car, watching out the window, when I saw a bird flying around in the air. I had the thought that all great inventions are patterned after one of Heavenly Father’s creations. The first part of D&C 52:14 reads: And again, I will give unto you a pattern in all things. When I read this, it was an affirmation of my earlier thoughts. So I eagerly watched for more patterns provided by Heavenly Father. Was it after watching birds fly that great thinkers eventually produced airplanes? Did hovering Hummingbirds contribute to the development of helicopters? Beavers build dams and so do people. Even in marriage we have the pattern of Canadian Geese, who mate for life. I believe the most important pattern for us to notice is our bright sun. Every day it climbs over the mountain to light and warm the day. Every day it shines at 100% capacity. Even when clouds interfere with its direct rays, we feel its influence. The sun is a pattern of our Savior Jesus Christ. He is the light of the world. Night and day we can feel His influence in our lives. Even when clouds of tribulation block our path we can feel His love for us and His desire for our success. As the seasons of the year come and go, the location of the sun changes. In the summer the sun is closer to us and we feel more intense heat, whereas in winter it is further away. Although in nature the pattern repeats itself in a predictable cycle, we have the choice as to how intensely we want to feel the influence of Christ in our lives. We choose the location of the Son in cycle of our days by reading our scriptures, praying, renewing covenants, etc. In the July visiting teaching message Pres. Hinckley was quoted, “There is need for constant improvement in all of our lives”. If we take to heart this suggestion, and sincerely work at personal improvement we will be like our exemplar, Jesus Christ.

On a personal note, Thank you, thank you, thank you for your prayers, phone calls, and concern for our granddaughter Jayne. She is back home in Arizona and has received a clean bill of health from her doctor. We believe it was through the power of the priesthood and the faithful fasting and prayers in her behalf that brought forth this miracle in our lives. Thank you for sharing your faith with us.

Dear Heavenly Father

Dear Heavenly Father,

We don't like sick,

Please help.

(Prayer to Heavenly Father by Sam Bailey..Julianne's little brother after being told about baby Jayne.)

Two weeks ago tomorrow our family experienced an event that has changed our lives. Jen & her girls are here visiting for their yearly July vacation. On Friday, July 10th Jayne, who is 20 months old aspirated on either peanuts or popcorn. We had just finished eating BBQ pizza when this took place. We went from cleaning up dinner, getting kids ready for bed to.. drop everything and take care of Jayne. Within minutes she had stopped breathing and was limp. 911 was called as we attempted to clear her passageway and administer CPR. Within minutes the first officer arrived, swooping Jayne off the floor to take her to the street for a faster hand-off to paramedics. During the entire event, it was James who kept a clear head, worked on her, and gave her the life saving blessing as the officer waited for the ambulance. I attempted to call Austin, Rob, & Amy to let them know Jayne was on her way to the hospital, and I told them I was afraid she had choked to death. The paramedics did not stop to gather any information, they were handed Jayne, they got in the ambulance and were gone. Bill, Jen, & I followed as quickly as we could get a path cleared as James was trying to tell us she had responded. As we raced to Provo, breaking many traffic laws, we called James to find out what he meant. He said as he gave Jayne the blessing out on the front lawn she had tried to breathe. Austin was the first to arrive at the hospital. He was ready to administer to her. By the time she was in the ER she had very labored breathing, was crying, and she was alive. We arrived and were able to go right to her. At this point she was no longer limp, but her limbs & back were rigid & she could not focus her eyes. She was crying & very upset. I am sure she was very, very scared and did not understand what had happened. In the 2 hours we were at UVRMC she had a CAT scan and an EKG. Her color had improved. Both EKG & CAT scan came back normal, but she was not able to focus. It was at this time the medical staff working on Jayne told us she needed better care and arrangements were being made to life flight her to Primary Children's Medical Center in Salt Lake. As no one would be allowed to travel with her & it is a short flight, Bill & Jen left the hospital to get a head start. During this entire event Jen always wanted someone with Jayne so she wouldn't be scared. It would be over 48 hours before Jen would let herself get a little sleep. So before they left, Jayne was given another blessing and was told she would make a full recovery. Bill & Jen left in order to be at the hospital when she arrived and Austin & I stayed behind. We talked to and kept touching Jayne to try to comfort her. At one point a nurse was trying to insert a 2nd IV in her foot and she was crying & upset, As I talked to her and looked in her eyes, for a tiny fraction of a second her eyes moved in a way I felt was normal and she was trying to see again. It was the first time in several hours I felt hope of a full recovery. After all the necessary paperwork & phone calls ahead to Primary's Jayne was wheeled out on a stretcher and loaded into the red life flight helicopter. I stood by her, told her to be brave, as the final preparations for her safe travel were made. I can not say enough complimentary words in behalf of the police, paramedics, pilots, nurses, etc in my corner of the world. Each was very professional & caring towards Jayne as they saved her life. I am grateful to live where all those life saving practices and procedures are in place. After Jayne left; Austin, Julianne, & I went to pick up Rob for the long drive to SLC. Without Jen close by I was able to cry for our little Jayne, still not sure what the outcome of this would be. When we arrived in SLC we found Jayne in the trauma ER surrounded by skilled & competent medical personal. Jayne had lost ground in the time that had passed. Her color had turned waxy & yellow and her breathing had declined to wheezy rattle and was even more labored. The most current x-ray showed a blockage in her airway and a surgical scope would be inserted & hopefully the piece or pieces would be removed and a quick recovery would ensue. As we waited in the waiting room we all breathed a sigh of relief as recovery was now in sight. Dave had been called numerous times by this time and would arrive the next morning via Southwest Airlines. At one point he was prepared to drive though the night to get to Jayne's side. Realizing he would arrive at appoximately the same time either way, he opted for the early a.m. flight. About an hour and a half later a doctor came to the waiting room to tell us they were not able to find any blockage, meaning they could not explain her symptoms or why they were so severe...possible answers were asthma, ARDS, or an allergic reaction, but we were back to square one. Jayne was in recovery and would be taken to the Pediatric ICU (PICU) where we would be able to see her again. It was at 3:00 a.m. when we were led into the PICU, where little tiny Jayne was in room 1, now on a ventilator, a suction tube in her nose, 2 IV's, heart monitors, and a toe wrap to monitor the oxygen in her blood. By morning the staff had turned her breathing 100% over to the ventilator as she was breathing too fast and breathing against the ventilator. They did not want her to wear herself out and it was critical for her to get enough oxygen. At this point she was still considered to be in critical condition. Through these hours Jayne was sedated and also administered a paralytic to keep her calm, allowing her body and mind to recover and giving the doctors more time to figure out what was wrong. As we waited by her bedside Saturday, she slowly improved. The nurses were able to turn the ventilator down and allow her to begin to take over her own breathing. Her temperature would go up to borderline fever and they would treat that and it would come back down. Her heart rate was above normal, but that was expected due to the drugs she had been given. Her blood pressure was up high, then down below normal, again due to the drugs. Slowly as the hours went by the drugs were reduced, the ventilator turned down, and we continued to wait for answers. We kept watching for signs that there would be no brain damage. On Sunday morning as she was coughing, she coughed out the ventilator. Her nurse had to think fast and decide whether to reinsert it or leave it out. She decided to leave it out, which was the right decision. As the medication wore off, Jayne was restless & at one point rolled toward Jen when Jen talked to her. On Sunday morning when Gramps & I went into the PICU, there was Jayne sitting on Jen's lap! Gramps started crying. It was a miracle. In fact it was a lot of miracle's in one. Jayne remained in the PICU until Monday then moved to a private room, where she stayed until Wednesday. In the end this is what I understand happened. Jayne aspirated on popcorn or peanuts at our house. As the fragment blocked her airway fluid was drawn into her lungs causing her to quit breathing. At UVRMC her blood was drawn and cultured. A bacteria which is 3rd most common in causing ear infections & pneumonia was found in her blood stream. Although the bacteria is a common one, it is not common or healthy to be found in the blood. Jayne was placed on antibiotics within 24 hours to combat that bacteria. The fluid in her lungs dissipated quickly, which is true in cases of aspiration. The blockage on the x-rays was believed to be pneumonia. Before being released from the hospital a PICC line was inserted and she receives a daily dose of antibiotics to combat the bacteria and the pneumonia. I am posting this experience to quiet the rumors of seizures, ARDS, affixation, etc. I am also posting to say thank you to the many, many kind and generous family members and friends who called, took care of kids, fed us, prayed with us, and helped carry us through this scary time. I am reminded of the importance of being in the right place at the right time, but more importantly James, Rob, Dave, Gramps, Eric, & Austin were worthy to exercise the Priesthood and bring the power of heaven which saved Jayne's life. We are grateful and recognize her life was spared and we have the continued responsibility to care for her and love her. We will be more kind, more grateful, and more careful from this experience.

Happy 4th of July...I Said it First!

Happy Fourth of July! I am looking forward to family, fun, & fireworks! We are heading to Las Vegas for our annual Hoopes family reunion & this year we will all be there! First time since before Rob left on his mission 4 years ago. We've added so many family members since then, Julianne, Stephen, & Eric; plus Sariah, Jayne & Addy as babies. Who knew it would be so hard to get us all together. My hope is we have a fabulous time together & it won't be so long before we are all together again. P.S. photo is from last 4th of July Freedom Festival Fun Run in Provo, Utah. Brynn ran like a streak of lightening & grandma was left in the dust! Thanks goodness we found her at the end of the race.

A Week & a Day

It is already Monday & I haven't posted for last week....too busy! It has been a busy week, but I am not complaining. There is always fun mixed in with the work. Last Sunday I was trying to leave church, when I got stopped by Teancum's primary teacher. She is a great friend in my life. We were visiting teaching partners for a while. Teancum is in good hands. She let me in on a funny though. She said Teancum said, "If the pioneers had just run, they would have gotten to SLC faster...!" I am still laughing at that one. Those silly pioneers that walked & walked & walked....& walked. We have had a lot of rain in Utah. Mushrooms are popping up in lawns everywhere & snails are multiplying tenfold. Anyone have any good escargot recipes? On Monday I recruited Austin, Julianne, Addy, Robby, & Grampa to help my cousin Marilyn start moving. She is moving to a smaller place & saving a little bit of rent $. We loaded the truck twice, then went to Cold Stone for ice cream. I challenged Grampa to 2 lessons, 1 service project, & 1 activity a month for FHE. We'll see what happens tonight. Tuesday was a loooong day. In preparation for driving to Arizona on Wednesday I worked my hours ahead. I ended up working 8.5 hours, which topped me off for the week. After work was the packing & preparation for travel. I had been cleaning house & had a couple of projects left to finish. I went to bed @ about 1 a.m. & woke up at the usual time, excited to get on the road. Wednesday was the long, long car ride. In order for Grampa to have phone service on a working day, we drove the Las Vegas route. It takes a couple of hours longer that way. He did work on several work related issues, so the sacrifice is worth it, but 11 hour in I started to whine or murmur. If there was a facebook Book of Mormon character quiz I would maybe be Sariah! (murmur in the dessert!) We did eat at In & Out in St George, which is the Las Vegas route bonus. We finally arrived to the screams of 4 little girls. It is always fun when people are excited to see you. Thursday morning Jen & 3 of the girls, Tess, Brynn, & Claire had their full dress rehearsal for their dance recital. I was left to tend Jayne. Jamie came over & we hit the swimming pool. When Jayne fell asleep I was worried she was getting sunburned so we got out of the pool & went to Paradise Bakery for lunch & Savers for some bargains. I found 2 bar stools for grand kids to use around the table. It was fun to see Jamie & spend time with her. Jen & girls came home, we had chicken bruschetta for dinner, & relaxed in front of the television while working on dance projects. Friday was a little overcast, but it didn't stop us from a 2 hour swim. I found out Jayne wasn't sunburned, but my shoulders were. The girls & I played the color game, motorboat, motorboat, & played & played. It was a fun activity. We hopped out in time to dress for the recital. It was a fantastic show. After helping behind the scenes I sat down in my seat, pulled out the camera just to have Amanda say, "You can't take any flash photography in here." Oh my goodness. I sat through 41 song & dance routines & couldn't take even one picture. So many pretty dancers. Dave did a father daughter number with Tess & Brynn & Jen brought the house down with the teacher dance. I am so glad our errand to Arizona included their year end recital. It was priceless. Jen let us in on her news that she is having surgery on her heel this Tuesday. So on Saturday we packed for 4. We brought Brynn & Claire home with us. We drove home through Page, which is shorter & faster. The girls were on their best behavior. The only fussing was when Claire wanted to pick every movie, but Brynn is a peacemaker & would usually let her get away with it. Thanks Brynn. Our ride was quieter due to your generosity. That wraps up our week of work, travel, & fun. I am working ahead this week in prep to go to our family reunion in Las Vegas...I can't retire "busy" from my vocabulary yet. Thanks to Julianne & Erin for taking care of Brynn & Claire while I work. Between their own kids + 2 Julianne's backyard looked like a daycare facility...

A.W.O.L.

I have fallen off the blog, but have set a goal to update once a week. Hopefully I can find time on Sunday to do a week in review, at least until I get under control. This past week has been busy, as usual. Tuesday was Teancum's 10th birthday. He is now in the double digits! Their family went swimming in Lehi, then Pizza @ home. We watched him open presents which included a Bionicle, a BB gun, 2 squirt guns, & the best clothes. Springville celebrated it's annual Art City Days this week. Gramps & I bought a scone on Wednesday night & James & Erin took the kids to the carnival so they could ride a few rides. Saturday Gramps, Austin, Julianne, Addy, & I watched the parade. It was fun to watch Addy clap & wave. We picked up a few candies and did a little people watching. Actually, we got TMI of a particular parade attendee. I went to the quilt show by myself. It seemed like there were more quilts this year, so it was fun for me. I hope I have time to quilt before I am too old to quilt. We hit the food, carnival strip, & craft booths Saturday evening. Eric declared his new passion is to graduate college and then work into the "carney business". We couldn't be more excited for their future! Addy got to pick a duck out of the pond for a prize. She watched the ducks go round & round, but was hesitant to choose one & pick it up. With her dad's help she was a winner & got to choose a prize out of the bin. I watched the fireworks over the treetops from our front window. It has been so rainy & wet, we thought they would be cancelled. The next hot year I will go watch them up close & personal. Along with celebrating Art City Days I worked 33 hours. We are taking our big table & chairs to Arizona this next week, so I worked hours ahead. I attended RS board meeting. I walked 81,024 steps this week. Thursday I drove up to Bountiful and Amy & I made 6 freezer meals. The jury is still out whether or not we like them. It was fun to chat & work with Amy. I was lucky enough to not help with the clean-up. Amy had a test to get to & I dropped her off. So we worked hard & left the mess for them to face after school. (p.s. A & E, thanks for cleaning up our mess!) Saturday, between ACD events I met with Kris, Kathy, & Pam to celebrate Kris's birthday, which is today...Flag Day! Last Sunday morning a high council member called & said my name had been submitted to be on the Utah food committee for trek, would I accept? My thought process has been..."really? I feel really busy, but maybe it is a figment of my imagination." I accepted, don't know yet what that will entail. Also Saturday between events we went to a ward BBQ @ Big Hollow Park. Gramps took his grill & helped cook hamburgers. I made a fun new salad. I got the recipe from the extension agency class I took a couple of weeks ago. It was a hit. It has jicama, avacado, & pineapple in it & 2 serrano peppers give it zip. I am working on my list for the coming week & it looks about the same...No rest for the wicked comes to mind.

How Deep Is Your Snow?

On a snowy day in March I blogged just how cold & snowy the day was considering the date on the calendar. After all March does boast the first day of Spring.  I must now admit my complaints & sarcasm were premature. It is now April 16 and again we woke up to a boat load of snow. Will this winter ever end? All morning long I thought of sarcastic one-liners to describe snow in April.  Then I reminded myself of a kindly farmer type that once told me, "Spring snow is like a layer of fertilizer." I am sure the snow helps in the greening process, but is anyone else tired of the soft white blanket outside? Sad, but true...in August I will need someone to remind how cold this April snow was as I am complaining of the hot, dog days of August. But at the present time I am keeping my fingers crossed that warmer weather is just around the corner.

Colored Eggs or Colored Walls?

On Saturday while all families with kids were busy dipping boiled eggs in dye...Grandpa & I dipped paint brushes in paint to freshen up a room in our home. Thanks to the generous help of Austin, Amy,  Robby, & Ashlyn we were able to start Friday evening & finish Saturday afternoon. The next day Austin, Reese, Eric, & Robby even moved the office furniture in...Now I need to clean the blind and hang pictures. I hope you all had fun coloring eggs, but I'll admit I'm happy I have newly colored walls!

Thank You....Thank You Very Much!

I am grateful for the many hands that helped prepare for and those family and friends in attendance at Amy & Eric's wedding & dinner. In sending out thank you notes I do not want to leave anyone out that contributed in time, effort, or coin. I appreciate the effort of those that traveled, especially those with children. It is disruptive to schedules and costly. Thank you for your support. The closer to the day, it seemed  more details wanted immediate attention. Thanks to all that pitched in whether it was cooking, cleaning, crafting, sewing, combing kids hair, tending children for long hours, shopping, running errands, melting chocolate, playing a musical instrument, picking up flowers or shirts, etc. As you can see the partial list is lengthy and there was so much more help..too much to list. The important message here is thank you for your help. I couldn't have pulled it off alone and every contribution was valuable making each of you a hero in my eyes.

Give

March 26, 1944  I wonder if any of the people sitting in warm, comfortable homes have any idea what it must be like to be a beggar? Have any of those "good, dear people" ever asked themselves about the lives of poor people or children around them? All right everyone gives a beggar a few coppers now and then. But it is usually pushed hurriedly into his hands, and the door is closed.

We are all born alike; they were helpless and innocent, too. Everyone breathes the same air, a great many people believe in the same God! Everyone is born the same, everyone has to die, and nothing remains of their worldly glory. Riches, power and fame last only for a few years! Why do people cling so desperately to these transitory things? Why can't people who have more than they need for themselves give that surplus to their fellow citizens? Why should some people have such a hard time during their few years on this earth?

The true greatness of a person does not lie in riches or power, but in character and goodness. Everyone is human, everyone has his faults and shortcomings, but everyone is born with a great deal that is good in him. And if one were to begin by encouraging the good, bu giving poor people the feeling that they are human beings, too, one would not even need money or possessions to do this.

Everything begins with the little things. For instance, don't only stand up in a tram for the rich mothers, no, remember the poor ones too. Say you are sorry if you step on a poor person's toes as you would for someone rich. People will always follow a good example' be the one to set the good example, then others will follow. More and more people will become friendly and generous, until finally poor people will not be looked down upon anymore.

How lovely to think that no one need wait a moment; we can start now, start slowly changing the world! Ho lovely that everyone, great and small, can make a contributions toward introducing justice straightaway! Just as with so many thins, most people grumble because they think they receive so little themselves. Open your eyes, first make sure that you are always fair yourself! Give of yourself, give as much as you can! and you can always, always give something, even it it is only kindness! If everyone were to do this and not be as stingy with a kindly word, then there would be much more justice and love in the world. Give and you shall receive, much more than you would ever have thought possible. Give, give again and again, don't lose courage, keep it up and go on giving! No one has ever become poor from giving! If you do this, then in a few generations no one will need to pity the beggar children anymore, because they will not exist?

There is plenty of room for everyone in the world, enough money, riches and beauty for all to share! God has made enough for everyone! Let us all begin then by sharing it fairly. 

Visiting Teachers Take Note: New Lesson Manual!